cloudy days in istanbul winter
the view from my window, watching ships pass
i’m living through dark, cloudy days in this istanbul winter. i can feel the heaviness of my own body - gravity pulling me to the ground: to lay very still and quiet, like a frog at the bottom of a well, trying hard not to jump. (where would i jump to?) a voice in my head tells me: when spring comes, i will miss this feeling. i think about the darkness of berlin winter, the ambivalence of berlin weather, how berlin was the city where i learned to enjoy darkness & cold. but what i want is for the winter sun to come into my room, and cut me open.
a year ago: pottery for winter beauty
2 years ago: how to feel at home anywhere