choose satiation over fullness
on gifting our days with the things that truly nourish us, instead of just making our lives feel “full”
there is a difference between being satiated, versus just being full. you can fill yourself in a number of ways — with food, activities, tasks, work, mental clutter, obligations, people. full is the lack of empty space; to be full means that you’ve maximized your holding capacity, containing as much as possible into your being.
satiation is something else. satiation is never about how much you consume, but what you consume. it’s not about how long it takes, it’s how that time feels. it’s very easy to fill a house to the brim with “things;” much more difficult to choose the “things” that really matter to you, and makes the most impact.
you can be full from spending eight hours a day at a desk — full of mental (and the accompanying emotional) stimulation. but how often do you leave feeling satiated?
or. you can have a ten minute conversation with a friend that lingers with you the rest of the day, and nourishes your heart and soul. that’s satiation. independent of time and space.
feeling satiated is about being attentive to the fluid, changing nature of our inner holding space
what we need to feel satiated fluctuates, day to day. there is no perfect diet, exercise regime, optimized social calendar, ideal dosage of mental and emotional stimulation. part of the task of nourishment is to do it consciously in the present moment. we are changing, always, even if we don’t feel like we are — thus, the only way to be satiated is to tune into our bodies and intuitive selves, and ask.
aspire to be satiated, not merely full
satiation is a whole-being experience. it’s not about feeding desire— addictions are, by nature, insatiable. when you feel addicted to social media, or to checking your email… no amount of checking will satisfy that desire. it’s an endless loop designed to exploit a deep need for connection, intimacy, validation, and acknowledgement. but it addresses those needs on a very surface level. it never lasts, no matter how many text messages you exchange with your friends.
on the other hand, have you ever had a long weekend where you rarely felt the urge to check your phone? that’s satiation.
satiation happens in your mind
if satiation is that feeling of having had enough — and feeling nourished, content, satisfied with that enough-ness, it’s also up to us to define: what is enough?
what feels enough?
there is nothing wrong with being hungry, but could it be that we are hungry not because we’re not consuming enough, but because we’re consuming the less-than-nutritious things?
how can we understand the real nature of our hunger?
and what are we truly, deeply hungry for?
and to be clear. I’m not saying we ought to be satisfied with less. but simply to start to ask these questions about our hunger, and how we are — or aren’t — meeting the deeper needs behind them.
too often, we “fill” our lives with anything and everything - because we’re afraid of emptiness. but. emptiness, too, can be a gift. emptiness itself can be satiating.
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an exercise:
step 1 - make a list of the things that filled your day.
step 2 - out of this list, which activities or events made you feel the most satiated?
step 3 - what deeper need did it satiate for you?