squeeze every drop out of life

in the end, all of the choices I try to make — including the minutia of the day to day, including the most difficult ones — came from my deep desire to squeeze every drop of life from every single moment. I was so extreme in my own stubbornness. I couldn’t compromise. I couldn’t sit at a desk working for someone else and feel my life energy, potential, future being funneled in a direction that I didn’t fully trust in. I couldn’t continue living in an expensive city that put me in survival mode, even if it was a city that I loved deeply, fell hard for, had romantic dreams about. and my biggest challenge — is that I had to learn to let go of relationships and addiction to intimacy — which, ultimately, drained me and prevented me from seeing clearly. and this is why I don’t use social media, I don’t read the news, and I don’t check my phone until noon everyday. because to squeeze every drop of life is to see clearly the infinity and magic and beauty of every moment. it’s to know that life is too precious to waste scrolling, worrying about things you cannot control, and living our days in a blur, half-blind.

these days, I’ve been feeling really good — living close to the bone, my days becoming more and more lean. distilling my days to practices for nourishing my wellbeing, my art, my commitment to myself.