introvert marketing for creative hermits

 

this is part of my series on world-building.

I wanted to write a post about introvert marketing for creatives because, for many many many MANY years, marketing was the one thing that I absolutely dreaded, hated, in a hide-in-the-closet-under-the-sea kind of way. My comfort zone was always to be alone in my own world, making things alone.

Unfortunately, this doesn’t work if you want to work for yourself, build a business, or, do public-facing “work” of any kind — because to be any of those things is to keep an open channel with the world; to engage in a nourishing conversation with others. But at the beginning, that wasn’t how I looked at marketing.

I saw marketing as the pressure to promote myself — and I hated that.

So I did all the things, read all the marketing books — until I was so full of the “SHOULDS” — [post X times on social media, reach out to this or that person to ask for a feature, promote yourself on this or that channel, make this marketing funnel] — until I felt totally paralyzed and overwhelmed.

It took me many years of unlearning and struggling with that resistance, before I could find a way into marketing that actually feels nourishing to my soul.

Let me share it with you, here.


marketing = sharing the essence of your work with other beings


First things first.

What if you talked to one person at a time?

The most important thing, for me, was to totally reframe how I felt about marketing. I hated thinking of the sharing my work as “marketing” — because it conjures this faceless “marketplace” of potential “customers.” Instead, it was much easier to imagine that the people drawn to my work are individuals with whom I could sit down at a cafe with, and have a cup of tea with.

It helped me to think of marketing as simply: sharing my work with one person at a time — even if what I do on the internet can be accessed by everyone, anyone, anywhere. (This is the magic of the internet: asynchronous intimacy at scale, across distances.) This intimacy draws me closer. It lets me be more honest, more inspired, more real — like I’m talking to a friend, rather than a “customer avatar.” I’m terrible at marketing. But I know how to make friends, one person at a time.

[Other times, when I write, I write to “the universe.” I write to myself. I post something on my website and it feels like whispering to a mountain, or a black hole. This is okay, too. You can keep doing it, if it feels nourishing to your soul. How do you know that the universe doesn’t hear you, eventually?]

The infinite essence of you

When you meet someone in person, before you even talk to them, you will feel into their “vibe” — their energy, aura, whatever. I want to propose that on the internet, you can also connect through “vibes” — or through your essence and energy.

This might mean: less filtering. More truth.

What I know is this:

when you share your work from the heart-core of your essence, you have an infinite resource of effortless expression.

Why? Because your essence is infinite. And when you share from that place, it doesn’t feel like “marketing,” it feels like you being and radiating — yourself. Who you really are.

But, to do this, you — and all the parts of you that might feel afraid, hesitant, shy, with the urge to hide — you need to feel safe.

You need to be able to pour your essence into spaces and channels where you can feel fully received.

 

The only rule: do what feels good


I don’t want to give prescriptive advice — but only suggestions and insights from my own grappling with questions. I’m going to write down these questions — in case you are asking yourself the same ones.

Questions that took up so much space in my head:

  • What should I do to “market” myself? Which platforms should I be on?

  • Should I force myself to do X or Y if I don’t like it?

  • How can I find a way to like it, more?

  • Should I just grit my teeth and muscle through X or Y task?

  • Should I hire someone else to do it?

  • Am I missing out if I don’t do it?


The only rule I’m telling you to cut through this head-fog of questions is this:

Do what feels good.
If you don’t know, take the time to experiment, and find out.
Do what feels good, and trust that it’s what you need.


Don’t do all the SHOULDS that you hear around you. Don’t do what other people tell you to do. Don’t follow a process that worked for someone else, because it may or may not work for you. Don’t listen to any advice I give you — unless it feels like a mirror to a small voice inside of you that already knows the way.

The things I do — world-building — may or may not work for you. The only way is for you to experiment, to be with yourself, and find out.


a map of sharing practices

side note: sometimes sending cold emails or outreach emails could feel nourishing, too — ie, if I have a crush and want to send fan mail, or want to connect with someone.

I made this map of my own marketing feelings, ranking things from FEELS TERRIBLE to FEELS NOURISHING. What I notice from this list is that everything that feels nourishing is sharing from a place of creativity, inspiration, and joy.

In other words, sharing can’t feel like an obligation — or I’ll never do it.

The very act of sharing my work has to inspire me.

  • When I create something and post it on my site, I’m articulate a half-formed vision, thought, idea, or process I’m working through for myself.

  • When I send a newsletter, I’m taking a step back and reflecting on, feeling proud of all the work I made. OR, I’m feeling enoughness and present with where I am — even if it means I don’t have anything new to share.

  • When I work on my website, I’m building a digital experience that I take pleasure and joy in — a way of organizing my work that feels useful, delightful, or clarifying, a form of world-building that makes my world feel more true and rich.

  • When I respond to an email, it’s because I really want to connect with that person I’m writing to.

  • When I make a new offer, I’m really excited to collaborate with anyone willing to trust me to do the work — together.

Working through resistance

This is not to say that I don’t feel resistance in doing those things — even the things I enjoy while I’m doing it. The resistance is mental, from feeling too clogged or overwhelmed with too many unfinished things. I work through it by cultivating slow practices and rituals — as integrated with creation, as possible, and as embedded into my week, as possible.

Other forms of resistance come from the fear of failure, the paralysis of perfectionism, or anxiety around being seen. Those feelings still arise in me, all the time — the antidote, for me, is the practice of awareness, sharing with friends, and deep journaling.


My minimalist sharing practice:

These days, the practices I have for marketing / sharing my work is simply:

  1. Create something

  2. Share on my website (aka, world-building)

  3. Send a letter about it (newsletters)


This could change. Perhaps one day, I’ll make a practice of writing fan mail to people whose work I admire. But for now, having a minimalist practice gives me a frame that I can inhabit with as much creativity, presence, and fullness, as possible.

It allows me to show up, and allow myself to be seen, to connect from my introverted artist self — as my greatest strength.

 
growing a businessKening Zhumarketing, world-building, sharing your work