all the flavors of ice cream i am giving myself

summer diaries. no 7

drawing this picture made me remember how, when you’re a child, ice cream, in its wholesome indulgence, felt like it was conditional. you had to earn ice cream — by good behavior, by hoping your parents were in a good mood, by some divine twist of fate. now that i’m an adult (more or less), i order ice cream delivered to my house. i choose 500 grams of it, 4 flavors. i eat as much as i want. when i’m done, i can order more. (not that I do eat it very fast… but it’s the ideal of possibility that counts).

it feels like such a defiant act of self love — giving yourself the options of infinity. not needing to choose one flavor. not needing to feel deserving of ice cream in order to eat it. you always deserve ice cream. by that i mean, you always deserve indulgently good things.