a berlin spring weather log

UPDATE: had a very very bad week and I abandoned this project. will resume another day.

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spring weather in berlin, for me, is far more unbearable than winter. in winter you know it’s dark. but early spring in berlin consists of a tortured moodiness and inconsistent sun that will drive one crazy. that is to say, spring in berlin is a wise teacher for all the important lessons you need to learn in life: on endurance, patience, and grace in the face of sudden, drastic change. on living totally in the moment of the weather.

I’m playing an experiment for the next month or two — where I’ll do the opposite of a weather forecast. I’ll do a weather log — full of subjective observations I make about the atmosphere outside. I’m also including a note on the weather inside of me (marked with KZ, and rated how I feel from a 1-10)

friday april 2 2021

AM & PM | sun dances in and out all day
KZ | (0/10) in total solar eclipse. no words.

thursday march 31 2021

AM & PM | cool & grey with hints of sheer sunlight
KZ (1/10) the slow crash happens.

wednesday march 30 2021

AM & PM | a burning consistent sun that makes me shocked to believe I’m in the same city. all the people are coming out, which makes me want to be inside.
KZ | (2/10) tornado weather & dust storms. quelling an urge to escape. watching my anxiety like a slow crash.

tuesday march 29 2021

AM & PM | unbearably bright and sunny
KZ | (2/10) a debilitating yellow fog, with intermittent lightening. the worst migraine of my life.

monday march 28 2021
AM | downy goose feather clouds obscuring brightness
PM | half-cloud sky. then, blindingly, confusingly warm — car windows down, rap music blasting kind of warm. one becomes unrecognizable to oneself. and to all others. tempelhofer feld is crowded with kites.
KZ | (7/10) light fog with sudden rain. remembering two years ago: when I lived alone in a top floor apartment and painted minimalist flowers & read poetry out of my loneliness and disappointment in love.